played one game eventually. sam's game stall. it was nice. i played it before in fairfield carnival n got the top price. so i was determined to get the top price again or maybe 2nd. ken was wid me. met him there n asked him to company n help me along too. he gave me a hint. tat water only came out of 5 tubes. he encouraged me too n in the end, i got a mark of water between 3rd n 4th. nathanel, my pri sch fren, was mending the stall. so i begged him to take it as a 3rd level marking n so i got a nail polish for a prize! n sam gave me a rubber ball n a highlighter. rushed off for piano lesson. a real pity. tot of talking to Ken more.

saw him at the carnival today. initially, i saw him at the concourse there. wid many of my guy classmates. i got a big shock n decided to avoid him while waiting for sh at the concourse area. met her n we walked off to North Lodge. went to a food stall there as sh wanted to get food. n i couldn't believe it la! so coincidental, he's sitting behind together wid chie yin! i was totally shock when sh suddenly face me n say he's behind. why is it so coincidental?! i wanted to avoid him but why make my path cross his again?

i went off. din wanna greet him. but eventually, when i left North Lodge, i decided to tok to him n chie yin. besides, i haven't toked to chie yin for a long time. called out to the both of them but he din respond. only cy responded. we toked. cy n i toked alot. catched up. toked abt results n all. but he. he was super silent. as usual. he din even say a word. i was super upset la. it sure hurt my heart. but i thank God there was this one moment when he looked up n looked at me. i looked at him too but there was this feeling of hurt n pain that pierced thru my being. it was scary n painful. tat was wad made me turn away. n once again, i get to see his smile. i dunno wad he's smiling at. i dun care. as long as i see his smile again. it was beautiful...still as beautiful...

u noe, sumtimes i wished i put acjc as first choice. den at least, i could see him more often in the sch. but then again, to see him again would be painful? yes. perhaps. but i'm afraid of losing tat frenship. i dun wanna lose it. acutally, i think i'm losin it already. wid most of our few conversaions as one-way. it's really in a "bad shape". i wished things wun turn out this way. lord, pls grant me patience to wait for him to be ready to tok to me. n lord, pls do a miracle in our lives lord. tat he'll start toking to me again n i'll be more patient n grant us opportunities to meet up/tok again/catch up.

after seeing wad happen here. n getting all this kinda tots. i began to think of my frens. n there n then, i felt lyk all my frens are abandoning me. esp my close frens. they all seem very busy wid their work, tat's why they dun/hardly call on me. it's sad. real upsetting. tat's why it seems lyk my whole world is tearing apart. lyk i'm ms lonely. sigh. felt much better jus now but got online n now feel as bad as jus now. sigh. i shld be alright tml. i shld be. it's usually better aft one night's rest....