today i hit an all-time low emotionally. went to church. felt lyk a santa claus giving out presents. ha. but glad to put a smile on ppl's faces. and see so many ppl la. amazing how Christmas always seems to gather everyone back. saw jess and cary. miss them lots. and they brought alot of frens too. saw jethro's frens that joined us for youth camp--howard, tai khoon, weng fai..and gave them present. when i gave to howard, he said he felt bad. ha. but dun nid la. and then, joyce and elieen turned up too! =) samantha's back! with an american accent. i played the keyboard today. not bad. new song though it sounds a bit weird when we finally played it during service.

then, lunch was good. not too bad though i din eat a $5 worth of food. ha. and i had a hard time finding aunty jennifer! after lunch, gathered the youths and that's where the whole sad story comes in. spoke. announced. asked. silent. blank faces. flared up. anger boiling. spoke to kah hwee and aunty janet who were very nice. cried. broke down. le jing's comfort. thanks gal. wash up. still very hurt until now. there. the story told in short sentences. it wasn't about the skit that i was angry about but the character of the youth body. the pile-up of feelings throughout this year that escalated towards the end of this year and into the trigger--the skit.

kah hwee was very nice to me. gave me good encouragements. thanks. so was le jing when she talked to me. but no words and no one can change wad has already been marred in me. life as an assistant leader really isn't easy. i din expect hinderances and obstacles to be this bad. really. i know the road wun be easy but not this bad. i dunno. on the surface, perhaps, none of you can see it. unless i say it out loud. well, i still have one more year. part of my term. i jus pray that i'll be willing to ask for strength. reminds me of wad nicholas shared today during his testimony: God does not help those who help themselves, rather, helps those who are willing to let God help them. amen to that!

today was the baptism of the 2 samuels and nicholas! missed nic's one. quite sad. but glad i was in time for the faber crest samuel :) i also had my baptism on the christmas season about 7 years ago :)

after church, went home, drop the things and went out again to shop at town. with mum and dad! so hip eh? i think they are one of the oldest there in the shopping malls. ha. reuben bought a levi jeans. saw jethro and his frens :) glad to see them again. had a little more chat with daniel as he decides whether to buy the $59 lamp for a gal that he doesn't know very well. wow. i tell you. when i heard that story from him, i was so shock la. spent so much on a gal that you dunno well. so dunno wad kinda taste the gal has also. hmm. i was thinking to myself: if ever there's a guy that does this to me, i'll be so touched and happy! haha.

okay. got myself an OP pencil box that looks more lyk a big pouch and i got a pouch to replace my current wallet cos the buckle at the zip jus broke. yeah. thanks mum for buyin that pencil box and thanks sarah for the new pouch! it wasn't easy finding the pencil box. walked to many places. and i din really lyk the billabong designs. too common. plus it was raining and among the 4 of us (not incl my sis), we only had one umbrella. and poor dad was caught in the last batch of heavy rain cos he was trying to find us amist the crowd. nevertheless, it was nice and an experience to go town with my parents. they always dun lyk the idea of going town. so it really did surprise me when they suggested it!